Reminder about Amanda's Memorial September 22, 2012

September 22, 2012

Amanda De Lange Memorial/Open House

Open House: 4:30 pm- 6:30 pm
Memorial Service Time: 7:00 pm
Place:
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
1988 W. 11400 S. South Jordan, Utah 84095
Life celebration: 4:30pm - 6:30pm
Memorial Service: 7:00 pm
Light refreshment will be served.
Children welcome.
Please try not to wear black. (Amanda’s request)

Come Celebrate Amanda’s amazing life and legacy!

We will be celebrating Amanda’s life with an OPEN HOUSE from 4:30pm-6:30pm.
This will include video commemorations of Amanda’s life, displays, and light refreshment. Amanda’s friends will have the chance to meet one another and reflect on her amazing legacy. The memorial service will begin in the chapel at 7:00 p.m. under the direction of Bishop Jeff Beckman. The service will include music, prayers, remarks about Amanda’s life and her love of the Savior.
Children are absolutely welcome and encouraged to attend both of these events held in the LDS Church which is family friendly and has a mother’s room, changing tables in the restrooms, etc. If you can join us, please respond by EVITE or email Stephanie Barbee or Ali Johnson.
skbarbee@comcast.net or joyous_johnsons@yahoo.com Please come!

Travel Information for Salt Lake City, Utah

If flying, the Salt Lake City International airport code is “SLC” with airline carriers Jet Blue, Delta Airlines, South West, American Airlines, United, US Airways, and Frontier Airlines. There is plenty of ground transportation available right at the airport: cabs, rental cars, and Trax rail system.
South Jordan is roughly 25 minutes from the airport and is easily accessible from I-15 going south.
Here are a couple of HOTELS we can suggest which are close to the chapel.

Holiday Inn Express:
10680 South Automall Drive Sandy, Ut 804070
Hotel Front Desk 1-801-495-1317

CountryYard Marriott
Sandy-Salt Lake City 10701 S. Holiday Park Dr. Sandy, Utah 84070 USA Phone:
1-801-571-3600
Toll-free:
1-801-571-3600

Hilton Garden Inn Salt Lake City/Sandy
277 West Sego Lily Drive, Sandy, Utah, 84070, USA
TEL: 1-801-352-9400
SUPER 8 S JORDAN/SANDY/SLC AREA
10722 S 300 W, Interstate 15 Exit 293 or 292, South Jordan, UT 84095-4077 
US Phone: 1-801-553-8888

In Lieu of Flowers/Memorial Contributions

In Lieu of Flowers:

It was Amanda’s hope that instead of flowers, those who wish to remember her would make a contribution in her memory to Starfish Children’s Services. You may do this either going to the website
www.thestarfishfosterhome.org/index.apsx

Clicking on the orange “Donate Now” box at the top to make a donation online. You will be able to indicate that your donation is “in memory of” Amanda. Or, you may send a check to Starfish Children’s Services, attn: Patrick McLaughlin, Board Chair, 6 West 122nd street, New York, NY 10027. Make checks payable to the “Starfish Children’s Services” and indicate “ in memory of Amanda.”

As Amanda would sign
“Live, Laugh, Love”

Details about Amanda's Memorial in September

Come and celebrate Amanda De Lange's amazing life and legacy!

This Memorial Service will begin in the Chapel at 7:00 p.m. under the direction of Bishop Jeff  Beckman. The service will include music, prayers, remarks about Amanda’s life and her love of her Savior. Then, we’ll reconvene in the Multipurpose Room at 8:15 p.m. for a continued Celebration of Life,  as Amanda requested. This will include music and video commemorations of Amanda’s life, additional remarks, and displays. Light refreshment will be provided. Children are absolutely welcome and encouraged to attend both of these events – the LDS Church is family friendly and has a mother’s room, changing tables in the restrooms, etc. If you can join us, please respond by email  at skbarbee@comcast.net  If you don’t know your plans yet, no problem – please just come! 

Hosts:  Stephanie Barbee, Ally Johnson, Amanda Oaks

When:  Saturday, September 22, 2012 at 7 pm

Where:  LDS Church, 1988 W. 11400 South,  South Jordan, Utah 84095

Information for Celebrating Amanda!

July 21, 2012

Nashville, Tennessee, USA

Dear Friends,

It’s been one week since Amanda de Lange returned home to her Heavenly Father. I know those of us in Nashville have been reflecting on Amanda, with love and gratitude for her life and her work. And from the hundreds of messages posted on her Facebook and sent to StoriesofStarfish@gmail.com, so many of you around the world are doing the same. Please continue sending your stories and memories!

We’re writing with further details about several things related to Amanda, and to answer some questions that have been asked in emails so all can benefit from the information:

Memorial Service and Celebration of Amanda’s Life – Saturday, August 4, 2012

Time: 4 p.m.

Place: The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, 4300 Hillsboro Road, Nashville, Tennessee, 37215, USA

What to expect: The Memorial Service will begin in the Chapel at 4:00 p.m. under the direction of Bishop Jeff Webber and Relief Society President Sherri Farr and will include music, prayers, remarks about Amanda’s life and her love of her Savior, Jesus Christ, as Amanda requested. Then, we’ll reconvene in the Multipurpose Room at 5:15 p.m. for a continued Celebration of Life, also as Amanda requested. This will include music and video commemorations of Amanda’s life, additional remarks, displays and places to write notes of thanks to the medical teams that provided wonderful care – dinner also will be provided. Guests are welcome to stay and visit with one another. Children are absolutely welcome and encouraged to attend both of these events – the LDS Church is family friendly and has a mother’s room, changing tables in the restrooms, etc. Parking will be available at the Church, and in the lot directly across the street from the Church. If you know for certain that you’re planning to attend the events on August. 4^th, please email me at eveboger@me.com as we’re planning food. If you don’t know your plans yet, no problem – please just come! There will be plenty for all!

Travel Information for Nashville, Tennessee

If flying, the Nashville International Airport is airport code “BNA” and serves a full menu of airlines. There is plenty of ground transportation available right at the airport as well: cabs, rental cars, etc.

If driving, Nashville is easily accessible from I-65, going north and south.

Here are three hotels we can suggest – the first two are in the Maryland Farms area of Brentwood, and convenient to restaurants and the Interstate; the last one is in the Green Hills area of Nashville and close to the LDS Church, also convenient to restaurants and the Interstate:

Baymont Inn & Suites

111 Penn Warren Drive

Brentwood TN  37027

615-376-4666

Courtyard by Marriott

103 East Park Drive

Brentwood TN  37027

877-851-6763

Hampton Inn & Suites

2324 Crestmoor Road

Nashville TN  37215

615-777-0001

Remembrances of Amanda

Memorial Contributions / In Lieu of Flowers: It was Amanda’s hope that instead of flowers, those who wish to remember her would make a contribution in her memory to Starfish Children’s Services. You may do this by either going to the website www.thestarfishfosterhome.org/index.apsx and clicking on the orange “Donate Now” box at the top to make a donation online. You will be able to indicate that your donation is “in memory of” Amanda. Or, you may send a check to Starfish Children’s Service, attn: Patrick McLaughlin, Board Chair, 6 West 122^nd Street, New York, NY  10027. Make checks payable to “Starfish Children’s Services” and indicate “in memory of Amanda.”

Cards: If you’d like to mail cards or letters of condolence, or other remembrances of Amanda, please mail to attn: Eve Boger, 9481 Foothills Drive, Brentwood, TN 37027

Post-Memorial Celebration – date TBA, either September 13 or 14, 2012

Place: Salt Lake City, Utah

More details will be forthcoming on this celebration. If you have any questions specifically related to this, please email Sherri Farr at sherrifarr@comcast.net and she will get you in touch with the organizers in Utah.

Amanda’s Book

As you know, it was Amanda’s final wish that a book be written about her life and Starfish babies. Thank you for sending your stories and memories to the email address: StoriesofStarfish@gmail.com and please continue to do so. You may also submit photos and videos here as well. While Amanda was here in Nashville, we met with several writers about her book. We have someone directing the project that Amanda chose, according to her wishes, and her intellectual property will be protected and shared in the way she has directed. We have an intellectual property attorney working on the project as well. We will share more on this at a later date – for now, we want to answer the many questions that have come in about Amanda’s book by assuring you that things are in good hands. We appreciate all of the queries and suggestions of potential contributors and writers. If you have additional information or thoughts to share about Amanda’s book, please email me at eveboger@me.com and I’ll be glad to share with the book’s director.

Amanda de Lange – Obituary

Amanda de Lange, 51, left this Earthly life on Saturday, July 14, 2012 at 10:48 a.m. CST surrounding by loving friends in Nashville, Tennessee, USA. She waged a courageous battle against uterine cancer, under the devoted and capable care of medical teams at Centennial Hospital, the Sarah Cannon Cancer Institute, and Tennessee Oncology Associates in Nashville.

As the Founder and Executive Director of Starfish Children’s Service, operating the Starfish Foster Home in Xi’an, China, Amanda took in medically fragile children from state orphanages in China, nurtured them back to health, provided their necessary surgeries, and prepared them to be adopted into forever families. Amanda and the incredible Starfish team and volunteers accomplished an incredible, loving feat in just seven short years, taking in 168 babies, arranging and funding nearly 250 surgeries, and facilitating 81 adoptions thus far.

Amanda was born March 12, 1961 in Johannesburg, South Africa to Adriaan Erasmus de Lange and Cornelia Etrecia Laing. Her father preceded her in death, and her mother, Etrecia Jacquet, survives her. Also survived by her sister Karen Beeton; brother Chris de Lange (Retha Lubbe); and nieces and nephews Simon Beeton, Lutzio Beeton Parks (Michael), Michael Beeton; and Mekyla Lubbe and Nanushka Lubbe.

Amanda belonged to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, which she joined at age 19 in Zimbabwe. She served a voluntary 18-month mission for the Church in South Africa. She was educated at Brigham Young University, in Provo, Utah, graduating with her bachelor’s degree in 1996. She subsequently taught English first in Taiwan and then in Mainland China -- which is where she began volunteering with Chinese orphanages and where the Chinese government granted her a license to open a foster home. Amanda was honored with the “Service to Family” Distinguished Service Award from Brigham Young University in 2009.

When asked what her obituary should include, Amanda said this: "We’ve taken care of 168 babies, we’ve had almost 250 surgeries and 81 adoptions and that, my friend, pretty much sums up my life. Because other than that, what is really important? You boil it down and that’s the triumph of my life.”

We hope to see you in Nashville August 4, or in Salt Lake City September 13 or 14 to celebrate the triumph of Amanda and her life. In the meantime, please contact Sherri Farr at sherrifarr@comcast.net with any questions.

Looking forward to being together!

Love,

Eve

Amanda de Lange 1961-2012

July 14, 2012

Nashville, Tennessee, USA

Dear Friends,

Amanda de Lange, 51, born March 12, 1961 in South Africa, returned to her Heavenly Father at 10:48 a.m. CST, Saturday, July 14, 2012 in Nashville, Tennessee, USA. Amanda left this Earthly life with her favorite songs and hymns filling the air, and more than a dozen friends at her side – some who have known her from the beginning of Starfish in 2005; close friends in Nashville and loving parents of adopted Chinese children; and dear friends from her church family who have helped care for her the last few months in the United States. It was a beautiful, serene setting in which to bid our Amanda farewell. She was never alone; words of love and appreciation were showered upon her; messages from friends were shared with her; she was able to say farewell to her family by phone; friends prayed with and for her; gentle fingers caressed her head; and cool cloths, foot and hand rubs were plentiful – her signature, beautiful nails a soft pink.

Amanda was enveloped in love as she left, and we have no doubt, wrapped in the arms of Heavenly Father with an even greater love as she arrived. So fitting for a woman who selflessly shared her passion and energy nurturing vulnerable orphans, restoring them to health, and preparing them for the loving arms of their new parents and forever families.

As the Founder and Executive Director of Starfish Children’s Service, operating the Starfish Foster Home in Xi’an, China, Amanda accomplished an incredible, loving feat in just seven short years. While she was in the hospital last week, Amanda reflected: “168 babies, nearly 250 surgeries, and 81 adoptions – that pretty much sums up my life!” There is so much humility in that one phrase – and even more impact. Eighty-one Starfishes with their forever families, and so many more ready for their turn, thanks to Amanda and the incredible Starfish team and volunteers.

Amanda also reflected, “I was blessed beyond measure to be given the opportunity to found and direct Starfish. I love that I took the opportunity when it was presented. God was good to me. My work has been a testimony of God’s love for the kids.”

Amanda also shared one of her favorite scriptures, Romans 8:28 from the New Testament: “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are called according to his purpose.” Amanda certainly loved God and showed it through her actions, and she felt called to serve China’s special needs orphans. She embodied this verse in her work.

We will update the blog as the plans are finalized for the memorial service and celebration of her life so that all who desire will be able to travel to Nashville, Tennessee and share in the joy of remembering Amanda. The date for this is August 4, 2012. (One hint I can give you: per Amanda, no one is to wear black, and there will be chocolate!)

There are also plans being made for a post-memorial celebration in Salt Lake City, Utah. The tentative dates being set aside for this are Sept. 13 or 14, 2012.

In the meantime, please contact Sherri Farr at 615-260-8640 or email at sherrifarr@comcast.net with any questions.

Please continue to send your stories and photos to StoriesofStarfish@gmail.com and if you’re her friend on Facebook, please continue to post messages there.

Thank you, dear friends, for your love and care for Amanda. While gone from our sight, her legacy and spirit will be with us forever.

Love,

Eve

Update on Amanda, July 12, 2012

July 12, 2012

Nashville, Tennessee, USA

Dear Friends,

I’m writing to share an update about our dear, beloved Amanda. Thank you for your many messages and photos you have shared since her last post on July 8th. As you know, she has been in hospice care with loving friends from near and far, church members, and nurses around her – a beautiful circle of care for her as she is going through this part of her life’s journey.

As the cancer is progressing, Amanda is having increased pain and discomfort, and therefore increased medication. Her moments of clarity are becoming fewer – the nurses believe the cancer is quickly advancing.

We ask you to now contact Sherri Farr at 615-260-8640 or email at sherrifarr@comcast.net to check if visits are advised.

We are able to tell Amanda of your phone calls and concern when she is lucid and that always brings a smile to her face!

Please continue to send your stories and photos to StoriesofStarfish@gmail.com and if you’re her friend on Facebook, please continue to post messages to her there. We will update the blog as there is news to share.

Please also know that one of Amanda's request is to have a memorial celebration of her life once the time is appropriate.  This will be an open service that all are welcome to attend.  Information about the timing of the memorial will be released once it is determined.

Amanda appreciates your prayers and concern – and she feels them daily. On her behalf, thank you!

As Amanda would say: life, love and laughter -- always,

Love,

Eve

Amanda's Letter

July 9, 2012
Nashville, Tennessee, USA  

Dear Friends,

Life is about decisions. There are a series of decisions we make every single day, from the routine like what to eat for breakfast, to the significant like what to do with our lives and where to spend our energies. This is an extremely difficult letter to write but I want to update you on developments of the last few days and some critical decisions that I have made.

In my last blog post on July 1, I shared with you that I was in the hospital and the chemotherapy was not working against the cancer, and the cancer was spreading. The doctors and I met several times to discuss the best and most effective next steps – lots of small and large decisions

There were two critical decision points I want to share: the first one came on Saturday, June 30, when we learned my kidneys were no longer working properly – the tumors were interfering with their operations. There were two decisions to consider in this case, either: 1) to do nothing, which meant I would have a matter of days to live, or 2) to do a procedure to help restore kidney functioning, which would give me more time. I chose the latter, and wrote to you last time that the procedure was successful

The next critical decision came on Monday, July 2, in meeting with the wonderful medical team that has been caring for me, to talk about the cancer and what could be done at this point. Again, there were essentially two paths: 1) I could pursue a stronger and different chemo to see if that would take on the cancer, or 2) I could transition out of the hospital and into hospice care to manage my pain and comfort for the remainder of my time on Earth. The first choice carried no guarantees for success as the cancer has now spread throughout my body, but did have a guarantee of making me feel sicker and likely more tethered to the hospital. The second choice would allow me the highest quality of life possible during this time, keep me comfortable and manage my pain, and allow me to accomplish the things on my “bucket list.” So, I made this choice with the support of my medical team and friends, and I feel at peace with this new approach.  

I was able to leave the hospital on July 4 and get settled in my new location. To make the journey, I took my first ride in an ambulance (the doctors insisted), and I’m now staying with Nashville friends, Valeri and John Overmyer, who have opened up their home to provide a place for me. We have nurses and volunteers coming by to provide care, and I am so thankful for their help. I have a comfortable room, and look over a serene and beautiful swimming pool and gardens.  

I feel so much gratitude to Heavenly Father to have this second option – to have more time – in order to focus on writing the story of Starfish. So many of you have been urging me to write a book, and I plan to spend my remaining time in that effort. I’m busily working to get many stories of Starfish and the babies documented and in this I ask for your help. If you have any stories about Starfish, the babies, experiences with or memories of me, our efforts in China, or anything else you could contribute to this collection of stories, please email them to StoriesofStarfish@gmail.com and please include your full name, address and phone number. I would be so grateful for anything you could share: stories, memories, pictures, etc., of all kinds, let’s have some fun with this!  

A second reason I’m so grateful for this extra time is to have the chance to say goodbye to those I love. Thank you for your calls, emails, and even visits some have been able to make. I may not be able to respond to every call or email, but I listen to and read your messages and they buoy my spirits – thank you! My new address is 911 Center Ridge Court, Brentwood TN 37027, USA, for mailing, or visits if you are in the area. Please call Valeri at 615-957-1573 to arrange a time to visit; she also can suggest hotels in the area if you are coming in from out of town.  

 I have been able to meet with the Starfish Board of Directors by conference call, and in person with our chair, Patrick McLauglin, to transition the work of the Starfish Foster Home. It is my hope and prayer that the excellent we have done the last seven years will continue, and he and the board have pledged their support and continued commitment.  

With this latest update I write, there are also decisions for you to make. You could choose to sit by and be sad, but I hope you’ll choose the path of joy and hope – and of action. I hope you’ll choose to share your memories and stories with me to help with the Starfish story. And I hope you’ll choose to honor and remember me by continuing to support Starfish and carry on the wonderful work of helping and healing the babies, and finding them forever families!  

It's been said that no man (or woman) is an island. I say that love is not an island, either. Each one of us affects each other in good ways or bad ways. Each of you has influenced me in so many good ways. There is a reason each of you have come into my life and you have blessed my life so much.

 I hope that I have touched your hearts and your lives as well. I hope in some way I have been able to feed your soul and have lifted and inspired you, and if I have, I pray that you will take that goodness and pay it forward. Together we can change the world one good deed at a time.  

To the babies of Starfish, I want you to know that I have given it my best effort, my all. My life has been to care for and love you. Wherever you go in your lives I wish you the very best. May you always be drawn to those in need and may you never forget that at a very critical time in your life there was someone there at the door to welcome you into the house. Be the change you want to see in the world.

It has been the greatest honor of my life to be associated with such fine people. I could not have done any of this without you, my friends, the nannies, and the good people of Xi'an, China. All my blessings have been a direct result of your support. I'm so grateful for your friendship and for your families and for sharing your homes with me.  

At this critical time in my life, I thank you for all of your support and concern for my health and well being, and for peace as I make this transition. Thank you for your emails and for your prayers. I look forward to hearing from you and reading your stories. I appreciate your support and I feel of your love and prayers. Please know of my love and gratitude for you all.

 Ever-abundant more life, love and laughter,
Amanda                

Update on AMANDA!

Dear friends,


I wanted to take time to write and update on how I have been doing.  I appreciate your emails and messages, but have not been able to answer every one.  Please know that I read them and it keeps me buoyed up that so many of you keep me in your daily prayers.  I am comforted to know that I am not in this on my own.


Six weeks ago I began a chemotherapy cycle of three weeks on of chemotherapy, followed by one week off.  I typically go in on Mondays and am at the chemotherapy clinic for 4-5 hours.  The chemotherapy makes me completely exhausted, but I have not had nausea or vomiting.  My hair did start falling out again, so I recently cut it very short but did not shave it bald.  I am on my second cycle of this chemotherapy regime.


This past Monday, however, my hemoglobin (red blood cell) counts were too low so I was not able to receive chemo this week.  I did get a blood transfusion of 3 units, which took all day to infuse.  The doctors decided to repeat my CT scans now rather than waiting till the middle of July, and the reports did not show good news.  The chemo is not working at all, and my cancer has progressed.  I am in the hospital now, and had a small procedure to alleviate some symptoms I was having.  The doctors are also working on the best type of pain control for me.  We are deciding on a new course of action given the recent results of the CT scans, and will pass that on as it evolves.


I am so grateful for the excellent care that I am getting here in Nashville, and I want you to know that I am battling as hard as I can.  Please keep sending emails, and know that I read and treasure them even if I cannot respond.  I thank you for your prayers.  They are truly felt.


Life, love and laughter,


Amanda